Mostly Bollogs, I'm afraid

But occasionally, a glimmer of truth.
If you find one, please let me know.

Tuesday, 4 January 2011


I went to the corner shop this morning.

A young girl was sitting behind the counter, with her feet on the table, txting.

YG "Excuse me."
UM "Yes?"
YG "How do you spell Schizophrenic?"
UM [duly spells schizophrenic] "There's a word I don't use most days!"
YG "I live with it constantly."
UM [goes to find Red Bull, returns to counter]
YG "It's not too bad though, being schizophrenic."
UM "Well, at least you've always got a friend."
YG [missing point entirely] "I have lots of friends. Just that I've also got ADHD, Asperger's and I have learning difficulties."
UM [attempting to escape] "Oh."
YG "I'll never get a decent job. I got offered a job at £9 an hour working three days on and three days off and I'm qualified and everyfink but they don't want me because of my disabilities."
UM "Well, keep smiling."

How The Actual Fuck did we gets here? Which tossbag told this girl that she had all of these things?

Because I've seen her once, for about a minute, and I can assure you that she not only doesn't have at least most of them, but that she wears them proudly, like bloody sporting trophies.

I think I may revisit tomorrow and slap her arse most mightily. And find out who told her all this and do the same to them.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

IQ levels for diagnosis of Learning Disability:

Mild learning disability 50-70
Moderate learning disability 35-50
Severe learning disability 20-35
Profound learning disability <20

Now what qualifications does she have again?

Asperger's syndrome is an autism spectrum disorder that is characterized by significant difficulties in social interaction, along with restricted and repetitive patterns of behavior and interests.

So she has lots of friends...

Now £9.00 an hour is not an insignificant hourly rate. It is a lot more than carers of people who have learning disabilities and who are on the autistic spectrum get.

This girl needs to count her blessings. She can obviously count her money.

What benefits do these diagnoses allow her to claim, I wonder.