Mostly Bollogs, I'm afraid

But occasionally, a glimmer of truth.
If you find one, please let me know.



Wednesday 30 August 2017

Guardian

The Tories are cruel.

When I were a lad, we had free school milk. I can't drink milk now, because the smell of it reminds me of when it was in the playground on sunny days, and against the radiator indoors in the winter.

If I knew then, as I know now, that the reason for this was to encourage the growth of bacteria to curdle the milk, thus putting off the unsuspecting children and thus saving public money, I would have been more proud of my lofty position of "milk monitor" and, if necessary, force fed my peers, nasally, with a bicycle pump instead of helping them to dispose of the product in plant pots and down the drains.

But no. I literally swallowed the idea that this milk was our blessed government's way of showing us that they loved us and looked after us.

And all was well, until the epitome of evil, Margaret Thatcher, took away the milk. And started a war with Germany. Or was it the Argentinians?

That's why I hate the Tories. They are vile, uncaring scumbags who are trying to destroy the NHS by stopping people having operations to become what they want to be, whether that be a different sex, or even in some cases a sex which hasn't yet been invented. Or aliens.

And they should be worried.

I know I am.

Had Kim Yong Un had school milk he would have grown up to be strong and virile and not have to wave his nuclear willy at Japan and start World War III.

But this is all in the past. Quantum ille canis, in fenstra est? I hear you ask, as if you understood Latin.

And with that, I let you draw you own conclusions. Vote early in the next election. and if you're in Tower Hamlets, vote often.

Real Pengy.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

As a Guardian reader I love you and want you to have all my money.

MacBojangles. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
MacBojangles. said...

How much is that doggy in the window?

Uncle Marvo said...

the one with the waggly tail?