Followers

One of us has the wrong idea about Twitter.

This "follower" thing. Piers Morgan has a million. I have around 500. I used to have more but then I got pissed off and deleted my account. That's quite fun, 'cos when you set another one up the screen goes blank. Cool.

Half of the Twits who follow me aren't real. I can't be arsed to delete them. I don't even know HOW to delete them. Half of the rest are weirdos, like me.

There is kerfuffle on Twitter today because apparently it's unfollowing people for fun. SNORK.

People who care about how many followers they've got are probably a bit sad. Actually, they're probably very sad. Amateur wannabee media whore sad. Ah well.

Here is a simple guide to how to get followed by me, in case you care.

Easy way: make sure your avi has a picture of decent Norks, or legs, and simply say hello.

Harder way: if you don't have to hand a set of Norks, or legs. Say something funny. Or clever. Or both.

How not to get followed, or to get unfollowed: simply talk about followers and virtually nothing else. Or ASK to be followed.

I don't look at #ff's. Only if they're funny or clever. Or have Norks in. Definitely NOT if they're from ffhelper or in a big list.

If someone RT's something from someone which makes me ROFL, PMSL or SNORK, I will probably follow the one who originally tweeted it, too.

Hope this helps. WHY anyone would want me following them I have ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA.