Mostly Bollogs, I'm afraid

But occasionally, a glimmer of truth.
If you find one, please let me know.

Wednesday, 14 September 2011


As you will know if you're a regular reader of this shit, I'm a rampant evil racist bastard with far right leanings who thinks that it's fine to earn loads of money and choose how to spend it, rather than hand it over to the government so they can decide, badly, who they're going to spunk it on.

I also think that chaps who wear frocks in hot countries are not to be trusted, and that trying to shove together a bunch of disparate countries with no common currency, language or even culture is a pretty stupid idea.

I like to travel a lot, when I can. I go to all sorts of strange places. I am old, and was brought up in a "Christian" country, and I wear trousers. And speak English.

I drink beer and smoke fags. And I eat pork.

If I go to an "Islamic" country, I don't drink beer (except in Turkey where they will serve it to you in a twenty metre radius of a mosque in a Coke cup as long as you pay cash and don't tell anyone). And I don't eat pork. You can't, unless you bring in your own pig. And the airlines have trouble with that.

If I go to a "Buddhist" or "Hindu" country, I don't drink beer except what I can get in bottles in the hotels, and I don't eat any sort of meat because I don't trust it. In fact, I have no idea what I'm getting because it written in squiggles, and you eat it with your fists (pretty much like up north).

I don't want to live in those countries. They don't fit what I want.

I don't mind if frock-wearing chaps with towel hats want to live in England. Not at all. As long as they want to speak English and live like English people live. We have laws, made by asshats mainly, which we sort of abide by. They need to abide by them, or live somewhere else. That's completely fair, it's a choice they make.

And there is really no doubt that we're going to hell in a handcart. It's because people put people on pedestals and think they must have been right, people like Keynes The Economist, who was clearly talking out of his ringpiece, but unfortunately his "theories", or as I like to call them, "horseshit" are still taught in universities around the world under the guise of "fact". That and the fact that half the country think the "left" is evil, half think the "right" is evil, and most are watching Big Fat Gypsy Wedding anyway.

Germany had a similar problem in the early 30s. I hear that inflation was running so high that people had to take their wages home in wheelbarrows, but then realised the wheelbarrow was worth more. So they voted for a government run by an Austrian bloke by the name of Hitler (he was really called Schicklgruber but that means "cuntface" in German so he changed it).

He was bonkers. But he had an eye for a nice uniform and a peculiar gait which was to be called the goosestep. Crap haircut and tache. But he was a great orator and he found a common enemy in the Jews. The Jews are a hard-working, although tight, lot, and they were pretty successful, especially when it came to moneylending and stuff. So he set the people against them, invaded Poland, became infamous, and probably spent the rest of his life in Peru or somewhere. Who knows?

Anyway, shut up Pengy.

There was a mob of what we in the 70s called the "skinheads", so called because they shaved their heads. They wore bovver boots and short trousers. They dies out eventually because they were cunts. But they used to do Paki Bashing, where you blamed pakistanis for everything. Pakistanis are a hard-working lot ... see above.

Today, there are the new skinheads. They are called the EDL. If you put all of them together in one place and added up their collective IQs, then converted it to its weight in kilos of dynamite, it wouldn't be enough to blow one of their hats off. They claim that the ragheads (an affectionate term for chaps who wear frocks and have those towelling hats) are the cause of all evil. Which they are not.

Sadly, people with those hats and often with hooks for hands and eyes missing due to an accident with explosives were responsible for blowing up some towers, the odd bus, etc. So it's easy for the idiots to target ALL of them. Muslims. Islam. I have many friends who are of Islam, i.e. are Muslims. They're a peaceable lot. Much more than "we" are. Bit bonkers IMHO, with all this religion malarkey, but then again, who isn't?

Anyway, the EDL are all over Twitter, like a shitty shirt. They use the hashtag #EDL. I'm going to troll the crap out of it today, just for fun. Feel free to join in.


Anonymous said...

I have to say these translations are beautiful! Keep up the exciting stuff.

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Anonymous said...

You seriously need to open your eyes.

David M

NewsboyCap said...

By up North I presume you mean Scotland, as us Northern English have been using stone tools for some time now.
But otherwise yes CUNTS.